Country Sayings 🗺️ in 2024

I’ll slap you to sleep, then slap you for sleeping.

Why, that egg-suckin’ dawg!

He’s as happy as if he had good sense.

He’s so dumb, he could throw himself on the ground and miss.

He’s tighter than a bull’s ass at fly time.

That would make a bishop mad enough to kick in stained glass windows.

He smelled bad enough to gag a maggot.

He’s got a burr in his saddle.

Her pants are so tight that if she farts it’ll blow her boots off

That dog won’t hunt.

Worthless as gum on a boot heel!

Happier than ol’ Blue layin’ on the porch chewin’ on a big ol’ catfish head.

Tighter than a flea’s ass over a rain barrel.

Something smells bad enough to knock a dog off a gut wagon.

His knickers are in a knot.

You’re gonna have old and new-monia dressed like that!

You’re lyin’ like a no-legged dog!

I’ll knock you into the middle of next week looking both ways for Sunday!