Grinch Sayings in 2025

Stupid. Ugly. Out of date. This is ridiculous. If I can’t find something nice to wear I’m not going.

Oh, the Who-manity.

4:00, wallow in self-pity. 4:30, stare into the abyss. 5:00, solve world hunger, tell no one. 5:30, jazzercize; 6:30, dinner with me. I can’t cancel that again. 7:00, wrestle with my self-loathing. I’m booked. Of course, if I bump the loathing to 9, I could still be done in time to lay in bed, stare at the ceiling and slip slowly into madness.

And they’ll feast, feast, feast, feast. They’ll eat their Who-Pudding and rare Who-Roast Beast. But that’s something I just cannot stand in the least. Oh, no. I’M SPEAKING IN RHYME!

And then – the true meaning of Christmas came through, and the Grinch found the strength of*ten Grinches, plus two! 

I’m all toasty inside.

Tomorrow is Christmas. It’s practically here!

He swept up their presents with the speed of a wiz. And he knew he’d cause sadness, only theirs now, not his. All this excess and nonsense, it was all about greed. About meaningless stuff that they didn’t even need. Yeah. The Grinch went to work. He scooped up the toys. He raced against time, he raced against joy. He hit a few snags as he made his way through an angry orange cat and a sleepwalking Who.

Holiday who-be what-ee?

The ribbons! The wrappings! The tags! And the tinsel! The trimmings! The trappings!

Be it ever so heinous, there’s no place like home.

I could hang myself with all the bad Christmas neckties I found at the dump.

Oh no. The Presents. They’ll be destroyed. …And I *care*! What is the DEAL???

If you utter so much as one syllable, I’LL HUNT YOU DOWN AND GUT YOU LIKE A FISH! If you’d like to fax me, press the star key.

That is not a chew toy!

Max, grab a bag. We’ll come back for the rest. Of course when I say “we” I mean “you.

Look at those greedy little monsters. Loading themselves up with Christmas junk.

I could use a little social interaction.